Listen to your body...

Alternative health practitioners sometimes use something called "sounding"***. This is where they hold things (foods, medicines, photos of serial killers) near the patient's body and see how the body reacts.

If certain muscles twitch and heart rates change, this object is deemed positive. If other muscles kick in, or you start sweating profusely or vomit, this object is deemed negative. This food/medicine/person is bad for you & you should avoid them.

In short, you are supposed to listen to your body and avoid the things that are specifically toxic to you.

I thought of this last night. At 3am I was curled in the fetal position outside a patient's room. I was using all my energy to not vomit or lose consciousness. I think that baby-catching might not be my thing.

It was a busy day. I delivered 3 babies.

#1 Was a bit of a mess; baby had the cord wrapped around it's neck 3 times, wound so tight we could barely get scissors under it. Still, once babe was resuscitated, he started breathing on his own and should be fine.

#2 I delivered alone. Baby slid smoothly into my hands, parents and I rejoiced, I delivered the placenta and my boss complemented me on my cool. Yay!

#2-b I missed. My pager didn't go off in time, so I ran into the room to hear that sheep-like cry that signals new life.

#3 - I got paged at 2:45am. I ran downstairs. She was pushing. It was her first baby. Her skin was very tight and baby was just not coming. She pushed. She pushed. She pushed. Baby's head kept pressing the skin apart, then falling back. Finally baby came. Meconium in the liquor, baby was silent, but opened his eyes right away. Lots of blood. Lots of tearing. The placenta took a while to come. My boss and I were leaning in to start repairing some of the damage when everything went hot. I realised that I was going to throw up. The nearest bowl was full of placenta. I said, "Excuse me Dr, I need to step outside" and collapsed in the hallway.

Anyhoo, I think this is a sign. Every delivery gives me flashbacks. Every delivery makes me feel unwell. I don't like the smells. I don't like the sounds. The mess. The lack of control. I also don't like waking up surrounded by smirking nurses; don't get me wrong, they looked after me well, but I have yet to convince them that I'm not pregnant. They're already booking my delivery.

So, in conclusion: baby-catching? Not for me.

On to the next block, please!

***Don't quote me on this. I learned about sounding from a high-school friend who now practices as a HORSE naturopath. She uses this technique on horses. HORSES!